Suddenly I See

Friday, January 20, 2012

My Rodger

Two days ago Rodger and I celebrated our seventh year of dating.
We went to the place we are having our rehearsal dinner and ate there.
It seemed appropriate.

A little over seven years ago I was scared to love someone when I met Rodger. More accurately I was scared to let someone love me. I spent the first couple of months that I knew him pushing him away. Partly because he was nineteen but mostly because I was scared. He was cute and he brought me snacks to work and did sweet things but I liked to drink then and do stupid things. I was too scared to have something normal.

I often think back to a couple of months before I met Rodger when I told someone that I just wanted to meet a nice nineteen year old that would hold my hand. This was after knowing guys that didn't want to hold my hand. How can you not want to hold hands? I mean the Beatles wrote a whole song about it.

I really wasn't serious about meeting a nineteen year old but it's funny when you put something out in the universe how it can come back to you. It's also funny how when you let go of what your scared of good things can happen. So I let go. And I let him love me and I love him so much in return. He always (and still does) astounds me with what a good man he is. The good things he does and the way he treats people. And mostly the way he loves me, even when I am pretty close to a raging lunatic.

We have built a life together, a life that I love. And I am so thankful that one day I said "I really just want to meet a cute nineteen year old boy."

And I can't wait for that cute boy to be my cute husband and for us to have cute babies together.

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"I read once that the ancient Egyptians had fifty words for sand & the Eskimos had a hundred words for snow. I wish I had a thousand words for love, but all that comes to mind is the way you move against me while you sleep & there are no words for that."
-Story People

2 comments:

vickie said...

This was really sweet and he is a great guy! Cannot wait to share in your big day!

Alexandra said...

Aw Katie! Tearing up! This is so sweet!