Suddenly I See

Friday, May 28, 2010

A Coming of Age Story

The lovely Miss Hannah wrote a great blog the other day about things she would tell her younger self and what her younger self would think of her now. (If I was smarter I would link you to her blog, but I don't know how. Maybe I should ask her. She is the queen of links).

This post of hers really got me thinking. What would my younger self think of who I am now and knowing what I know now what would I tell myself back then? And just where am I in life now compared to where I thought I would be at this age?

When I was ten I was pretty sure I would go to college in San Luis Obispo, get married at 22, and have a couple of babies. A little different than where I actually am.

It's been some time since I was 22 and even longer since I was ten. I think I would tell that ten year old little girl that she should be proud of herself for having goals and also that 22 is a bit young for children because she is a late bloomer and 22 is just young. I would also tell her to enjoy swimming more, it may seem like a chore but later in life you will think about how fun it is.

To my 14 year old self I would say not to gossip so much and don't get in squabbles with friends. When you are 15 don't drop out of chemistry, at 15 do you already want to be a quitter? There's not a ton of advice I would give myself in the high school years, maybe just enjoy the moments, life will never be this simple and carefree again. Oh yeah, and you don't need to get a job at 14, you have the rest of your life to work, you don't need to go shopping that often. Also, don't get in so many fights with your sister. It's petty and she is your life long best friend. You will be sorry for words said that you can't take back. Oh yeah, and take note at 18 and 23it's really stupid to hit a parked car.

Dear 19/20 year old self, have more fun in college, don't be afraid to make new friends, don't be so judgemental, and maybe study more often. And when you are a junior in college and you are thinking about switching majors really look into it. Don't just not do it because it sounds like a lot of work. You're going to take a very expensive fifth year of college anyway maybe get a degree in something you want and not take the easiest way out. But maybe one day you will want to go back to get a credential.

Oh 22 year old self, I could write a book of things to tell you. Most of all, I would tell you, "for the love of God slow down". You don't need to get a membership to a tanning salon, you don't need to use your credit cards so much, and you don't even like tequila stop drinking it. Wear longer skirts, don't drink so much, don't stay out so late. But you were a lot of fun then and you learned a lot. But I wish you had been more careful. I wish you had made better decisions. Self respect sweetheart, self respect. Control your own life and make good choices. But you had a good time and that's important too. You lived and learned a lot then. And at the end of that 22nd year when you meet that cute boy with the cool hair don't be afraid to let him be nice to you. You deserve it. It scares you and that's okay but you get out of life what you put in it. Let him treat you well. Let him buy you dinner, let him open your door, and trust your heart.

When you are 26 don't be so obsessed with working everything out. It's a journey, try to enjoy it. You are where you are for a reason. I am glad you are starting to figure out what's most important in life. Be there for your friends, don't be judgemental, just be there. Love them, they would do the same for you. Be thankful for everything you have and don't worry about what you don't have. Be thankful your parents let you live with them when you are certainly old enough to have figured something out. You are a lucky girl to have parents who you consider friends.

And who am I now? Not who I thought I would be when I was ten. That's okay. Don't judge yourself. And don't worry about the rough patches along the way, they made you who are today. And I think that's someone to be proud of.

And your 28 year old self thinks you are doing pretty good and that you have a life filled with immeasurable blessings.


Thanks Hannah for the thought provoking post.

4 comments:

Pam said...

All I can say is oh my gosh. This is so insightful. I also believe that the path to adulthood makes you who you are today and for you, that is a pretty wonderful person.

hanner said...

i wonder what these two commenters think about their choices as youth that they had to resort to spamming blogs.

vickie said...

I LOVE YOU!

Jenn said...

I got really teary reading this. I have so many things I would say to myself from about 13 to 26, I can't even begin to list them. I would say to your 22-26 year old self to smack your friend Jenn every now and then and tell her to get it together.

I love you!!!